GOTHIC IMPULSES

Misunderstood Goth movement:

All around the world many disaffected, resentful, rebellious teenagers are taken in by the Goth world. They find it a very suitable expression of their state of mind and therefore derive some solace from it. They say that almost every gay teen has to go through a Goth phase. It's a huge overstatement but there is some underlying truth in that and it is true as far as I am concerned. I have been influenced by the Goth movement from about two years. But whatever gothness I have has always been well hidden and never allowed to be incorporated in my personality. But sometimes I really want to start wearing black, dyeing my hair and wearing gothic makeup.



I want to act like a Goth as a statement of rebellion and because I could never fit in this society. And I despise this society for rejecting me and so I want to reject it and Goth seems perfect for that. I relate to Goth music and art.



But I guess being a Goth is just a wild desire which is never going to see the light of day. God, just imagining the reaction of my parents and the million relatives- common in the close-knit Paki extended family system- is enough to force even the thought of doing anything too unconventional out of my mind. But maybe someday I would be able to do what I want to do and live my life my way and then, I guess, I wouldn't even need Goth.

Kinda ironic.