MY STATE OF EXISTENCE

Life...That's just it. It's happening all around me and it fascinates me. Life can and does beat the shit out of me but surviving that is what life is about. And this blog is about me, someone who doesn't fit any stereotype or label. There are alot of labels I posess Pakistani, Muslim, Young, Gay, Student but I don't want to fit in some pre-conceived notion of those labels. I maintain my individuality and this blog is the affirmation of my uniqueness.

Sunday, October 17, 2004

AWESTRUCK



Today I was observing a baby and I noticed how curious and inquisitive these little pieces of meat are. They-and children- are full of zest and energy and seem surprised, amazed and fascinated by life and the world surrounding them. They intently observe everything, feel things, taste and smell them.



As we get older we seem to lose our fascination for this truly amazing world and start to view life in a monotonous, day-to-day frame of mind. We start to take things for granted and stop observing and thinking about stuff surrounding us. But there are so many things in this world that are just so amazingly miraculous.

Like, birth; it happens daily and we seem to take it for granted and don't make much of it but if we just think then we realize the mind-blowing miracle it is. There are also so many small things that we experience everyday in our life that are awe inspiring but just because we are so used to them we never give them a second thought.

Sexuality is one such matter. It never ceases to amaze me. The physical intercourse part itself is so vast and intricate but it is just a relatively small part of sexuality. There are innumerable thoughts, emotions, behaviors, gestures, words etc. that can turn us on but might have apparently nothing to do with the act of copulation. Because copulation is not even the main domain of sexuality. We enter the sexual phase of mind from so many things and some acts can be our main source of sexual pleasure and they might not be even related to copulation.

There is so much diversity is preferences and styles that it just flabbergasts me. There are people who get turned on by items of clothing, others by the act of polishing other people's shoes (sheesh, imagine that!) And these acts in their own right might become the principle component of a person's sexuality. Although these are unusual and extreme examples but the fact remains sexuality is NOT just about copulation or related stuff but instead it is a whole intricate and enigmatic sphere of a person's consciousness.

Just realizing that fact makes one awestruck at the complexity, miraculousness and beauty of it all. Human beings are such complicated mysterious animals and nature is inexplicably beautiful and intricate. And so when I think of all this, I remind myself not to let the dehumanizing ordeal of day-to-day living and monotonous schedules make me view humans, life and this world in a bland, nothing-special frame of mind.

AMAZING!